I must admit I faced the prospect of writing December’s newsletter with a high degree of trepidation. When I tell you that there was only one Saturday race in December, I’m sure you’ll understand my concern. So, what has saved my bacon? As Harold Macmillan famously replied, in another context, it was “Events dear boy, events!” Before I get to these, though, a more important task requires immediate attention. None of the excitement we’ve all enjoyed so effortlessly would happen without our fabulous race team volunteers. Here they are (minus Alan and Lisa) receiving our grateful thanks.


This year’s victuals were of a decidedly liquid nature! Not only have we not had to give up a sail to run a race but week after week we’ve been presented with excellent courses often set in quite trying circumstances.

The first race of December was an excellent example of the travails suffered by the race team. As we sailors trooped off to the changing rooms brimming with disappointment in the face of a glassy looking Poole Harbour, our angels from the south (sort of) confidently set off for the platform assuring us there would be wind. And they were right! You may recall that in last month’s newsletter I predicted that things between 3922 and 3936 might be about to get feisty. What I didn’t expect was that the aggravation was to be confined to one boat. Ian, quite correctly proclaims his innocence, but the fact remains that his crew,  Mike B started the race with two perfectly good eyes and finished it with only one performing at the expected level. The other, after a brief encounter with the end of the tiller extension decided it was going to take a well earned rest and closed up shop! Chris and Nadia led the other fifteen boats home, and, for once, John and Roberta avoided the journalist position (David McLeman, sailing with Martin Cooney had that honour), but on this occasion it was by coming 4^th rather than their usual 2^nd!

December 11^th offered hope to the race team in the form of a steady 10-15 kts of breeze, but with a degree of malevolence that was uncalled for, the weather gods had made all the water disappear. As it was quite cold, the majority of the sailors and all of the race team made the potentially dangerous decision to adjourn to the bar and await the return of the stuff that makes us able to race! Our gallant fleet captain, who will figure largely in this report later on, led the ‘charge’ out of the warmth of the clubhouse and onto the water. Later in the race, his enthusiasm for finishing third was definitely in question. Mervyn’s version of events was that one end of the spinnaker pole attached itself to the shroud, thus allowing Graham Scroggie and Jack to overtake them. Thus, having achieved the aim of not being third, Ron sorted out the mess, preventing John and Roberta from overtaking them. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I ask you to consider whether Mervyn’s claim that this was all the result of misadventure is one that you believe – I couldn’t possibly comment! In mitigation, Mervyn will point out that their final finishing position of sixth doesn’t suggest very coherent planning on his part! Congratulations to Ben and Graham in 4002 who, in the words of John Lyons (writing this report without the help of his helm), continue to show us how much faster we all need to get! Once again, the day showed us what a fantastically flexible race team we have.

The only race we managed to get in on Saturdays was on the 14^th. It was won by Richard Whitworth  and Jack (deputising for Trefor). Andrew Clark reported being confused by the appearance of two 4088s.  This was the result of a protracted investigation of the relative merits of mainsails undertaken by Pete Allam – I did wonder if Pete had secretly decided to sail with every boat number in the fleet, such is the frequency with which his boat has been sailing in disguise! Graham and Homfray will remember this race for some time, since two massive windshifts tested their agility to its limit. In Andrew’s words this sadly put them out of contention: they still beat us in 3974 though! No doubt Ian Linder, sailing with his newest recruit, Sam Moore, will have fonder memories of the race, managing to turn a near DFL into a respectable seventh place in the  latter stages of the contest.

The last series race of the season was run on the 18^th and it was reported on by none other than Ian Zimmerman, he that that wields the tiller extension as if he were Zorro! Ian has written more reports this season than I’ve made mistakes, i.e. a lot! Impressive though this is, the day will be remembered, by some of us at least, for the launching antics of team 4111. I’m guessing that the number of people who have seen Ron horizontal is small, but I became one of that number when I witnessed him hiking his life out trying to stop the boat from crashing into the pontoon, crushing him in the process! What was his helm doing I hear you ask. Basically, he was doing his best to get back into the boat after he had left it without notifying his intention to do so to the crew. It has to be said that Mervyn’s re-entry into the boat was somewhat tortuous. I was about to write something more insulting until my wife pointed out that it looked a lot like the way I move around the boat! It would have been funny had it not been for the fact that Ron’s hands had gone fifteen rounds with the wire of the shroud and guess who came off worst! However, this did persuade the Rasputin committee that Ron should be excused the award, although he very sportingly joined Mervyn in this photo.


Being in receipt of this trophy, puts Mervyn in with a shout of being the overall winner who will be gifted with the possibility of displaying this achievement at home (to be presented at the annual prize giving dinner) until the start of the new season when everyone’s slate is wiped clean and we do it all again! This blatant attempt to grab the final glory was, at the last minute foiled by Geof Gibbons. Normally, stumbling around the boat doesn’t qualify for the award of the Rasputin Cup (thank the Lord for that) but two factors were in play here. Firstly, his involuntary investigation of the bottom of the boat’s floor was spotted by Ian Zimmerman and secondly his crew was insistent that Geof should qualify for the award. Alan’s reward for this act of betrayal was to be invited to participate in the award ceremony!

You may recall that I mentioned that events had helped me to compose this newsletter but the last of these is the saddest because I have to report a departure. A long time friend on board 3966 decided that the time had come to part ways with Richard. No, I don’t mean Alan. I’m writing about Richard’s camera which decided to go and visit the fishes. It stars on our web-site as the subject of a very funny meme (or do I just mean cartoon?). Take a look, I defy you not to laugh!

This month saw the conclusion of our Saturday and Wednesday winter series. The latter was run over 12 races, four of which were won by the ‘Wednesday Wizards’ (credit goes to Ian Zimmerman), Steve and Crispin, but that was only good enough to secure them second spot on the podium because of a magnificently consistent series sailed by John and Roberta during which they had to endure the ‘homework’ slot 3 times! As I suggested before, the FFFS boats were indeed involved in a titanic struggle for supremacy. This time 3922 (mostly crewed by Ian and Mike B, I think) nudged 3936 into fourth place by a single point. 7 different winners of race in a 12-race series shows the competitive nature of our fleet; 3901 and 3974 managed to join the party as well as other more regular winners (you know who you are!).
Saturday racing was a bit of a curate’s egg with only one race sailed in December, and only seven in total, much to the frustration of those confined to week-end sailing. Even so, we had four different winners of race. Coming up on the rails, at the last minute, was Richard Whitworth and crews with 3 bullets from the last three races! (13pts) This nudged 3922 into 2^nd place (16pts), closely followed by Geof and those that crewed for him (18pts).

You might imagine that our turn-out figures for the last month of the year would reflect the dismal nature of the weather we’ve had, but you’d be wrong. 18 boats turned out for the one Saturday race, which boosted our average December turn-out for the two series combined to 16 boats. Well, I’m impressed even if you’re not!

The ‘Last Blast’ was scheduled for December 28^th and was to be our final sail of the year (the clue is in the title, I guess). Well, we all turned up, but the wind didn’t, apart from a tiny zephyr, which tempted a lone RS200 sailor onto the water. There is not a scale high enough to measure the degree of our smugness as, from the bar, we watched him drift back into the marina with a perfectly full reflection of his sail in the glassy, mirror-flat water! Although, we missed the fun of sailing, helping people transfer their boats from dinghy trailer to road trailer was a jolly affair. A couple of helms decided the procedure was a bit fraught for their taste and they decided to make the exchange with the boat in the water. Mike Clapp and his helpers achieved this feat with everyone staying dry on the pontoon. I did think, at one stage, that there was going to be a final, multiple joint award of the Rasputin Cup in the offing, but great balance won the day!

In conclusion, my final task is to announce the sailors of the month for December, the ceremony for which was performed at the ‘Procrastination Station’, after Mervyn had failed to secure enough votes for launching to take place. The winners for Wednesday’s award was 3922. I think you’ve already guessed why no names have been mentioned, yes it was the FFFS chaps. The award for Saturdays had a nice circular ring to it because the winners were one of the first, if not the first, crews to win a sailor of the month award: Mervyn and Ron in 4111. Mervyn’s delight was somewhat reduced when this award was immediately followed by another – a contentious ‘open swimmer’ badge (Mervyn is quite fond of these but not so much to receive one!). However, he graciously conceded defeat, and you can see the badge in pride of place on 4111’s transom. The reporter of the month will have to wait until we next convene (perhaps at Dick and Fi’s) for his award. The winner is Andrew Clark.

Well, that’s it for what turned out to be a rather eventful December (hence the lengthy report).
Let’s hope that January 2025 turns out to be dry in whichever sense you prefer!
 
 John Keates December '24